Music and lyrics by Boudleaux Bryant


If brains were thousand dollar bills

I'd tell you what I'd bet

You wouldn't have enough

To buy a cup of coffee yet

Well, that ain't the way I heared it

But here's a thought for you

Your's might as well be coffee grounds

For all the thinking they'll do



Well I guess I told you off

That ought to hold you for a spell

And the moment you don't like it

You can pack tonight, get out of sight

And go jump in the well!


Sometimes you make me so darn mad

That here's what I could do

I'd pick you up and shake you up

And bite you half in two

Well that ain't the way I heared it

And sister if you do

You'll learn right quick that you done

Bit off more than you can chew




If common sense was ice cubes

You can take it straight from me

You wouldn't even have enough

To cool a glass of tea

Well that ain't the way I heared it

You're just a wasting breath

If them ice cubes was ignorance

You'd done be froze to death